uninvited gay thoughts

[shiseido]

[first things first she's the realest.

shitty lyrics put aside, Isuke Inukai legitimately is the realest (according to her, at least) and she ain't afraid to let people know it. not everyone agrees but ha ha like their opinions matter!! hairflip, sneer, naw— everything head to toe about Isuke practically screams self-absorbed narcissist. on that much, everyone can agree.

on the opposite side of the spectrum is Nio Hashiri, midget freak who... well, that's all there is to it.

that's all there should be to it, but lately the aforementioned self-absorbed narcissist had found her eyes moving from the mirror to that freaky blonde kid sitting on the other side of the classroom. Isuke doesn't spare her attention to anyone else. it's unheard of. and yet...

hm. well. it's unsettling, to say the least.

maybe the problem could've fixed itself if they weren't assigned to do a project together. whatever the class is, Isuke doesn't care for it and she doesn't intend to waste any effort on this thing she's supposed to do with Nio Hashiri. they're in her single dorm (ofc she'd pay extra to not have a roommate), Isuke sitting crosslegged on the sofa and filing her nails. you know, instead of working or helping Nio out.]

If you need any help be sure to ask Isuke, okay?

[ l a u g h s ]

That was a joke, in case you're too dense to tell. ♥

[yeah, that oughta be rid of those INTRUSIVE GAY THOUGHTS (to put it bluntly)]

Comments

[shiseido]

If they're into that sort of thing. Whatever. ♥

[it's not like she's vaguely jealous or curious or anything????]

[smellykid]

Don't underestimate cougars, Isuke-sama. They've got claws. Rawwwwr.

[ She. Is. Trying. So. Hard. Not. To. Laugh. ]

[shiseido]

Claws dulled by age, certainly. ♥ [ughhh!!!!!!! she's heading back over to stand over Nio, looking like she really wants to yank on that antenna again.]

That's disgusting, that you'd go after only old women.

[smellykid]

Older women, actually!

[ She says it with the tone saved for convincing someone you didn't just do something to annoy the hell out of them by crushing their favourite anime figure set. All those waifus now live in the figure graveyard. Sob. She didn't mean anything by it though and this action bracket set is hideous. Just. Look. Nio is scared by the look on Isuke's mug.

She's also covering her antenner. ]

And they come after me; what can I say? I'm a charmer!

[shiseido]

A charmer? Haha, what a funny joke! ♥ It's so funny I could just—

[yank on Nio's ears instead?! well, since that antennar is covered up and all.]

[smellykid]

Nhoooo, not my ears! I need those to hear your orders, mistress!

[ Just like she needs her tongue to take the piss, you see. It's essential to her identity as a servile little shitstain. Note; she isn't using her hands to push Isuke away because it'd only serve to make things worse. ]

Why do you even caaaare?!

[shiseido]

Why do you think?!

[no..... no homo tho.........]

[smellykid]

Is it. Maybe because... uhh. You're... jealous?

[ Said veeeery carefully, thanks. ]

[shiseido]

[WHAT PART OF NO HOMO—

goddamn. she yanks even harder on Nio's ears, practically seething. only because Nio's not far off the mark...!]

Ahaha, Isuke doesn't get jealous. Other people get jealous of Isuke. ♥

[smellykid]

Somebody help me! I'm gonna lose my best feature!

[ What does that even mean or is she just being irritating oh. Right. Nio is irritating. ]

You don't even know her so you aren't jealous I take back my foolish suggestion, ma'am!

[shiseido]

You're bluffing. There isn't actually an older woman going for you. Admit it.

[admit it so Isuke can stop having feelings!!]

[smellykid]

Why would I be bluffing?

[ Did she just turn the tables around on our hero? Now the answer ball is in Isuke's court. What will happen next...?! ]

Do you think I'm trying to seduce you...? Heh.

[ Oh. ]

[shiseido]

Excuse me? [pinching Nio's ears... and thankfully no punching. yet?!]

Do you even listen to yourself? Ugh!

[smellykid]

Kidding! Kidddddding! For the love of melon bread everywhere; please spare me!

[shiseido]

Why should I?! You've done nothing but piss me off since we met!

[doki doki]

[smellykid]

Because you're too beautiful to touch such rubbish! I'll make your hands dirty!

[ What a crawler. ]

[shiseido]

[gasp, Isuke actually does let go of Nio. the fuck are feelings. the fuck is love.

?????//]

Are you done with the report or not? You need to get out.

[pls leave...!!]

[smellykid]

[ That is gasp worthy. Nio is be cautious and glad as all get out. Hm. ]

Isuke, you're feeling okay, right?

[ Can she lean in real close? She might have to stand up to do this, but she puts her hand on the other gurls forehead. ]

[shiseido]

[THAT. NO. SWATTING AWAY. GET AWAY.]

Don't touch me—!

[smellykid]

[ Woahhhh what? That was unexpected and it totally goes closer towards her theory being true. ]

Isuke... seriously for a second, 'kay? Do you have a weirdly sweaty forehead or something?

[ No she doesn't think that but yes she'll pretend she do. She's really wondering if Isuke is feeling ~the lurve~ or something. ]

[shiseido]

[ N O slap slap slap get away]

As if. ♥ Isuke doesn't need you here anymore, so get out.

[knees weak arms spaghetti legs spaghetti everything is spaghetti]

[hashiri]

You're sure?

[ She actually doesn't want to go. Dammit. She's usually on her own most of the time but this is fun. Even if Isuke is as awful as everyone else in the world ew gross other people are hell. ]

If you want then I can stay and we can hold hands.

[shiseido]

[you know what fuck this it's already been over a hundred comments.

she suddenly grabs Nio by the antenna with one hand, her neck with the other— is Isuke about to tear her hair and head off at the same time?? is this truly the end??

no, she yanks Nio a bit higher so she can violently smash her lips against hers. one... two... okay she's shoving Nio away.]

Now you can leave.

[smellykid]

[ Nio's antennar is basically where all of her nerves are, meaning that yank hurt enough to actually, well, hurt. She can feel the tell tale stinging building up in her eyes and she knows tears are close. Dammit.

They're not tears of sadness because even she has her lameness limits but it does give her a weird feeling inside. Like. She's fine with being called gross and pathetic without much in the way of evidence, sure that's fine she deserves that, but if Isuke makes a comment about her tearing up then she'll have to actually feel something there and that's no-bueno.

The only thing distracting her from actual non-parody-of-a-human-being thoughts are Isuke's lips and the two seconds they spend joined firmly with her own. It's enough time to pull Nio's senses around but not enough time to understand what's happe-- and she's being told to leave.

And she's open mouthed and staring. ]

So... [ okay screw it she switches back to her snide little grin for this ] Isuke-sama is that type of girl? What a hussy.

[shiseido]

[something something something Intense Denial and a catastrophic apocalypse happening in the shriveled cold lump she calls a heart. Isuke always does what she does with deliberation but this is one of the very, very few instances where she almost regrets her actions.

well, almost. it felt kind of good to get that out even if she kind of wants to stab someone right now. someone else besides Nio. now that's progress.]

Shut the fuck up.

[kissu round 2!! oh lord she's biting.]